Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Best Beards in Horror


Watching sports can make one develop certain routines they think will help their team make the big win. The fans aren't the only ones with superstitions during important games; the athletes have their specific ways of doing things to keep order too. The Boston Red Sox are currently in the MLB's ALCS against the Detroit Tigers, and in case you haven't noticed--the teammates all have playoff beards. In honor of the Sox and their totally sexy facial hair, I've decided to take a look back at some of my favorite beards in horror.    

10.) Richard Attenborough: Jurassic Park

Aside from the awesome dinosaurs and the irresistible duo Sam Neill and Jeff Goldblum, the other beautiful thing in Jurassic Park was Richard Attenborough's beard. The facial hair only added to his character John Hammond's scientist-look and gave off the sweet, old grandpa vibe.


9.) Donald Pleasence: Prince of Darkness

Many horror fans fell in love with Donald Pleasence as Dr. Loomis in Halloween, but he was even more alluring with a a full beard as a man of the cloth in Prince of Darkness. Once again he captures the audience as the individual looking to do right and stop evil.

8.) Dexter Morgan: Dexter

 The Dexter series finale was disappointing in many ways, but one thing that made it better to watch for me was Dexter Morgan's lumber-jack beard. For some reason when a serial killer decides to fake his own death and live alone, it means growing out a creepy/awkward and unappealing ginger beard.

7.) Hershel: The Walking Dead

I thought that I was in love with Hershel's ponytail but when I thought about it and examined everyone's favorite one-legged old farmer more closely, I realized I was attracted to his beard. His disheveled and dirty new look made him stand out as a bad ass in the apocalypse and like a true one-time alcoholic.

6.) Kris Kristofferson: Blade

 One look into Kris Kristofferson's dreamy eyes and it's hard not get lost. Then take a look at his long, flowy hair and pure, white beard, and it's like you're in winter wonderland with Santa. The beard definitely made me more sympathetic and concerned for Blade's mentor, and I felt like I was watching the grandfather that I always wanted do his thing.

5.) AJ Bowen: A Horrible Way to Die

 AJ Bowen has rocked some awesome facial hair in a few movies but the beard I enjoyed the most is the one he sports in A Horrible Way to Die. Bowen plays a serial killer, and the beard definitely helps give off a killer vibe; however, I couldn't help but find him charming as the burly man trying to find his way back to his lady love.

4.) Richard Dreyfuss: Jaws

Richard Dreyfuss' character Hooper made marine biologists cool in Jaws. His witty remarks and intelligence were only accentuated with the help of his full beard and shaggy head of hair.

3.) James Brolin: The Amityville Horror 

It's easy to see why Kathy Lutz married George and uprooted her kids to a haunted house in Long Island. She was clearly hypnotized by his beard--and so were the spirits of the murdered family in their Amityville home. Brolin's beard made him look more like a tough, fatherly-figure and made whatever came out of his mouth sound serious.

2.) Bill Moseley: The Devil's Rejects

Not only did Bill Moseley's character Otis in The Devil's Rejects have the best lines, but he had the best overall look. His scraggly beard and ratty long hair made him fit the bill of psychotic redneck serial killer perfectly, and made him way more menacing to look at.

1.) Kurt Russell: The Thing

My favorite thing about John Carpenter's The Thing is Kurt Russell and his AMAZING hair. His perfectly feathered mane and neat full beard remained  intact while he tested his pals and handled flamethrowers in the midst of an alien takeover. Russell's beard SCREAMED action hero in the 1982 horror classic and set the bar for what facial hair should be.

Those are my favorite beards in horror. What are yours?

1 comments:

Jason Christopher said...

http://www.moviechambers.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Nobody-Gets-620x344.png - this shoulda been there ;)

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